Let me start with this…

How to stay in a relationship you’ve outgrown:

Ignore your heart. Fake it. Keep going through the motions. Stay because it’s better than being alone. Remember every good memory and justify the bad ones. Make excuses for all of the toxic words and behaviors. Don’t challenge them. Never say anything to hurt their ego. Avoid confrontation at all cost. Don’t listen to the advice of your close friends. Stay because it’s comfortable and familiar. Pretend you can’t see what’s happening right before your eyes. Ignore that little voice whispering at you to leave. Believe that you will be the one to change them. Dream up a false reality. You can do it, you can stay. The choice is up to you.

But let me tell you what I would do because I have been in your shoes. I’ve been where you are right now and more than once.

So this one’s for you. Single or dating, you’re the girl who’s unhappy, uncertain, and frustrated with your relationship or past relationship(s).

How to get out:

Ask yourself if the relationship is making you a better person. Ask yourself if that person is one of the best people you know. Ask yourself if the way he treats you is how you’d want your daughter to someday be treated by her boyfriend. Grace is a beautiful thing, but if there’s repeated abuse (physical or verbal) that’s the only red flag you need to simply cut ties and walk away.

So the next time your ex asks ‘what’s up?’ Don’t be afraid to say ‘my standards.’

Feeling feisty,
Manda

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3 comments

Reply

Hello Manda,
I found your website via Instagram. I really love this post. I have recently broke-up with my boyfriend two weeks ago and everything you described is how I felt when we were together. He was so abusive with me and even though I felt in love with him I wasn’t happy in the relationship at all. I stayed in the relationship because I didn’t want to be alone. I’m trying to be strong and just move on with my life. Thank you for such a wonderful post. I really needed to read something like this today.

Reply

Hi! I’m SO glad you stumbled upon this at just the right time in your life. You are worth WAY too much and worthy of a love that is true, real, patient, kind, just, sacrificial, … you get the point I hope <3 I will keep you in my prayers. I highly recommend the book "Lady In Waiting" if you haven't heard of that, check it out!

Reply

Hi! I’m so glad I found you . I’m reading all your posts and they are AMAZING. I never heard about that book but as soon as I read it on another of your posts. I went and bought it from Amazon. I can’t wait to read it. Thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot to me right now.

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